Roommate troubles are pretty much an inevitable part of the college experience. Cohabitating with anyone has its challenges, but throwing together a group of 18-22-year-olds living on their own for the first time often results in a unique sort of turmoil. Thankfully, doing your part to be a good roommate goes a long way toward improving your living situation. Here are some tips to make sure your side of the street (read: bedroom) is clean. Literally.

1. Ask, Don’t Assume

In other words, try to be considerate. Take responsibility for keeping your shared space in a state where everyone is comfortable. If you’ve watched Netflix’s recent show Wednesday, you’ll understand that this can go beyond doing the dishes (but seriously, do your dishes!) into things like decorations. Wednesday Addams has a werewolf roommate, Enid, who loves color, which clashes with Wednesday’s black and white goth girl vibe, so Wednesday strips the rainbow gel off of her side of their gorgeous shared window in the spirit of compromise (by the way, you can enroll me in a school for outcasts any day if that’s what the dorm rooms look like).

Anyway, this isn’t just a silly example. I was visiting my cousin a few weeks back and drama ensued when some new roommates moved in and hung a full-sized flag that said “Saturdays Are For the Girls” on the wall of the living room without asking permission. My cousin just thought it was funny, but one of her more sensitive roommates blew up the group chat and called management to complain. Respect is key, folks. If your dishes, obnoxious knick-knacks, or questionable noise levels are going without commentary from your roommates, maybe you should check that you really aren’t bothering them.

2. Be Real (no, not the app)

In an ideal world, we all get to room with our best friends, but sometimes it’s not possible to arrange that and living with strangers is the only option. Even so, remember that you can still be good roommates to each other. Friendships and roommate morale both depend on open and direct communication to keep drama at a minimum. While having a group chat with your roommates may seem smart, roommate chats can sometimes become a crutch so that no one actually has to face each other. You can’t expect to be free from passive aggressive texts about who should take the trash out, or who touched the thermostat, but as a good roommate, you can do your best to alleviate the tension and awkwardness with hilarious memes, or, better, just setting a precedent of taking up issues with people in person. Express your needs, share appreciation for the things your roommates do, and let them know about any plans you have that might affect them (like when you have people over, or are trying to record the perfect TikTok). If all goes well, your efforts can generate enough harmony to balance things out, and you and your roommates may even become friends after all.

3. Ditch the Negativity

Attitude is a powerful thing. You’re not going to be the perfect roommate. You and your roommates are going to make mistakes. Someone is going to cook fish and the apartment will never smell the same again. It happens. Just remember that it’s part of the college experience, and while having a private apartment would eliminate the chaos of sharing space with other human beings, you would have fewer wild stories to tell in the long run. People on social media profess the need to set hard boundaries and expectations and not tolerate people who disrespect you, and being a good roommate means doing that, sure, but it also requires you to think about others in a positive light. Do your part to be considerate and express your needs before throwing in the towel. When I dealt with a bad roommate, there were a lot of things that bothered me, but the worst was that I felt judged and disrespected by not being given the chance to work it out. Empathy is vital to conflict resolution. Whenever I get irritated with a roommate, or anyone, really, I try not to take it personally and remind myself that I don’t have the whole picture. It’s what I hope others do when I’m not at my best, and it’s essential to being a good roommate.